This Somehow Actually Exists: Face Yoga


Let me just start off by saying THIS IS HOW WE BREAK AMERICA!  There is this magical little gem on the internet called Face Yoga (The picture above is completely related because it’s the same lady who came up with this pyramid scheme). Face Yoga is basically designed to tighten up all of the skin on your face by stretching it out in a million different ways.  Forget that actual yoga is supposed to make you relaxed and more flexible.  Face Yoga defies the statistics and actually makes your skin erase those nasty sags and wrinkles.  It makes about as much sense as the name Football (the American one) or body wash (hello, just use shampoo everywhere).  Besides that, it makes you look like a scarier version of the Joker with the laugh of the Wicked Witch of the West.  Don’t believe me? Just watch the video below.  But prepare to be terrified as the lady Pokémon evolves contorts her face into the stuff of your Monday morning nightmares.

Seriously, I think I would rather watch Sinister or the Barbie movie again before I would watch that one.  It’s like a lifetime of constant Rick Rolls rolled stretched into one 4 minute video.  I would rather Sauron take the Ring from Frodo than watch that video ever again. I would rather Star Wars had never been invented than watch that video ever again! “Whoa whoa whoa buddy.  Aren’t you taking that a little too far?”  I’m going to assume you skipped watching the video and simply read this for the summarization.  Well that’s just TOO DANG BAD because I already summarized it in the opening paragraph….Okay so maybe Star Wars was a little too far….but I definitely would have killed off that whats-its-face director that just sold the franchise.  I actually wish that would happen anyway.  Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to go eat or something (assuming my cheeks stop hurting from all of that Face Yoga).

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